As soon as I heard this my mind immediately went to words like: Drive, Motivate, Perseverance, Determination and so many others that I have exhausted throughout my very intense lifetime.

From farm kid, to college athlete, piano accompanist, opera singer, pipeliner, coach, fitness enthusiast and teacher… everyone is always letting you know how you can be “better.”  My whole life has been a drive to not only be “better” but be “the best” (we’ve had a lot of counselling about this… but that’s a story for another time.)  My point is; I could never just be happy with myself… until 2020.

Prior to the pandemic, my daily life look like this:

4:00 Wake up

4:15 Gym

5:15 Feed/ Groom Horses/ Poop Scoop

6;30 Get ready for work

7:30 Go to work an hour early

8:30 Teach

10:15 Recess? I think not- you’re either on duty or students are with you

12:00 Lunch? Wrong again. You’re coaching a sport- you love it though!

2:40 School’s Out, but only for the kids, you’re going to spend the next hour with emails and documentation

4:00 You Teach Piano Lessons Now

6:30 You should eat before your sport

7:00 Volleyball, Softball, Football or a Sport or Exercise of some kind (You’ve convinced yourself this is your “social time”

9:00 Bed? No ma’am, you are now marking and lesson planning for tomorrow

11:30 Night Night, get ready to repeat

 

Is this sustainable? I mean… I sustained it for 3 years (with an unhealthy amount of black coffee I might add.)  You definitely don’t want to see what my pipelining life or college life looked like… let’s just say there was no social life and I was “stoked” if I ever got 4 hours of sleep (16 hour work days or taking 13 classes per semester will do that to someone.)  Why am I going into such detail about the last 10 years of my life on high speed? It’s either to justify to you  or myself my word for 2021. #repose

Hear that? I still feel the need to justify why I need to rest, sleep and slow down, but that’s an even bigger reason why I chose it, and maybe someday I won’t feel the need to have to justify taking a break.

When the pandemic hit, and my sports were cancelled, my job came to an end and summer began… I found myself putting all of me into my horses, and even got two more beautiful mares.  I spent the entire summer immersed in training these green horses and found a new/ old passion again.  I also realized I was getting copious amounts of sleep and exercise, while not being stressed (unless dealing with the Arabians…) I had more time for friends and family and was able to realize… slowing down might be a good thing.

Now that I am in school… I’m still sleeping 8 hours a day (over break I slept approximately 11 hours but my body needed it!) I’m able to balance so much more into my life or out of my life because I have decided to put me first, and remind myself to slow down.  Some days I do more, some days I do less, but overall I am doing way less and I think I might keep it this way.

Could my #oneword2021 be balance or patience? Sure, but I would justify “balancing” 5,000 activities a week and convince myself to just be “patient” with myself as I slowly go insane.  No, my #oneword2021 is “Repose” because I am putting me ahead of being “the best” because I deserve rest, sleep and tranquility of mind.